You're Back
by mikaera
Summary: Halina's POV of my story What you Have and I Want: Kai's returned home after eleven years, she thought he was dead, how hard can it be to be a mother when your son is already 17 years old, and you never saw him grow up?
1. Prologue

**Waaaah! As promised! Here it is the story 'What you have and I want' from Halina's point of view. I hope you like it and please, please review! **

**Dedicated to Rina, Öyku and Anna for their support with the first part, and to my Mom. **

**Disclaimer: Halina Nukomo and Demyan Hiwatari belong to me, Beyblade and Kai belong to Takao Aoki. Thank you.

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You're back. 

Prologue. 

We moved here ten years ago. Apart from business reasons, living so north keeps us hidden from the monsters we have to hide from. Sliding my fingers by an old picture I sigh. You were so young, so innocent. I feel the tears start forming, and close my eyes denying their appear, immediately putting the picture back in the drawer it was before. If only I would have been more cautious… less permissive. But what could I've done? He threatened me with your life... playing with someone's life is not funny. Playing with a 6-year-old's life… is cruel.

I gasp when I hear a knock on the door. It sounds low, resigned. I grab my grey coat, put it on, and walk to the door to receive my husband. He has returned home, later than usual, it's already ten o'clock.

There are no many ways of getting to Stadavok. The roads have no pavement, but there are no many cars anyway. The town has a harbor, and a train station. One of the trains comes from Moscow, it leaves the chief town at ten o'clock in the night, and arrives here about four am. Then it leaves again, about seven am. The other train, comes from a nearby, larger city, where the working demand is higher. There's where Demyan works. He's the owner of a small enterprise in which 350 workers are employed.

I open the door, the door handle is cold. When I look outside my eyes open wide. The snow storm has clearly enlarged. My husband, a tough man, half a head taller than me, with brown hair and black deep eyes enters to the house, and I follow him grabbing his valise. "Hard work?" I ask, as he sits in one of the three chairs that are around the wooden table on the kitchen.

"Somehow.- He answers, taking in his right hand some papers I forgot to put back again in the place from where I took them. He sighs, and looks at me. -you… have been thinking about him? … Halina… you'll only hurt yourself…"

I sigh again… it seems it's the only right thing to do when you miss someone dead, someone who isn't even buried, and you don't know where his ashes are, you have no idea of what happened to his body. I close my eyes. That's what I know about you. Nothing. I have no idea in which place of the paradise you are.

I'm talking to you, and I know you can hear me because you're dead. I had no more children after I had you, it was risky and your grandfather, the one who took you and let you be killed, is still alive. So if he couldn't manage with you, then why would I have more children? For him to take them again? You are my only child, and I still love you. In spite of knowing you're no longer in this world.

We have some photos of you. Though you were very little, I have some things that are preserved on time. Things like the pictures, and a diary where I've kept memories of your fifth year of life. The year 1993, the year when I lost you. I sit next to Demyan, and he takes my hand in his. I know he understands my pain. That's because he feels it too.

Some hours after I know he's leaving again. When something goes wrong at the enterprise, he's the one to be there first. He's doing the exact opposite things his father would do, long years ago, when Voltaire owned a company called Biovolt.

We've just have some tea, but I don't care of tiding up the things. After all, no one's coming, it's half past thee in the morning, and I'm alone at home. I'll just go back to bed, maybe read something.

He kisses my lips, and turns to leave. He takes a taxi, from the taxi company that resides at the train station. There must be two or three cars, we don't need nothing else in this little town. When it's not snowing, people tend to go to the only market we have on foot, to get some food and then go back home, waiting for the next snowstorm.

When I see the taxi leaving in the direction of the train station, I close the door behind me and sit in the sofa, grabbing a novel I've been reading. I don't know why, but I'm not sleepy, not yet.

About half an hour later I hear a knock on the door. I frown, what is it? The train to the city where the company's located doesn't leave until four, could have something go wrong? But this is not the same noise Demyan makes each time he returns home. I sit up, and get closer.

"Open the door!" someone shouts outside. His voice, I've figured out it's a guy, sounds rude and foreign.

"What do you want?" I ask, confused. No one visits us, never, and having someone behind my door at four o'clock in the morning… is weird. I wonder if you, from the sky, are watching at me confused as I am now.

"Open the door!" the person shouts again. What does he want? He's putting so much pressure on me, why that hurry to see me? Maybe someone froze out there in the storm and they're asking for someone's help? As the lights are on, maybe that's the most possible answer…

"At least tell me your name!" I ask, now worried by the fact that someone could be in danger and I'm only delaying him.

"I said open it dammit! The name is Kai." he says. Then my eyes open wide, automatically. I haven't heard this name in Russia for so long… you had that name. I named you in Japanese, because I am Japanese and Demyan agreed not to give you a Russian name, after all, his surname is Japanese too. I frown. Something tells me something is not right. I feel different… I feel strange… I feel willing to ask this guy… "Who are you?!" first, a long and deep silence. Then, finally, after some hesitation, the answer.

"I… I am your Son."

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**TBC,**

**Review! **


	2. You

**Hi readers!! I sincerely apologize for the delay. I did my best, I'm plenty of homework but I can't abandon this anyway. I'll finish it on time, don't worry. Perhaps I delay some time, but it won't be much. **

**Thank you for the reviews, and I'm glad you're liking the story. :). And, Bladz-Liska, you asked why she was thinking about him in the exact moment he was thinking about her, well, that will be revealed in this chapter. **

**Okay, I hope you enjoy reading… and please review! **

**Umm… maybe the chapters will be shorter than the ones in the other story, that's because not many descriptions are needed about the house, you already know how it is.

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You're Back

Chapter 1: You. 

I open the door as soon as I hear this. It's like an impulse that makes me do such a thing, when I know you're long dead, when I know this guy that's standing out there in the middle of the night has nothing to do with me, he's probably fooling me and I'm believing him.

Looking outside, if I hadn't been surprised enough yet, I gasp when I find myself staring at crimson eyes… which are identical to those I have. I frown, can this be possible? If someone told me I am dreaming, I'd surely believe him. I try to say something, but I know it's not the time. Then I recognize you, and I smile.

In some place in my head I sensed you were alive and would come some day. Even though Demyan had tried to convince me, and in fact he _had_ convinced me that you were dead, that you had been killed, I had the suspicion you were still alive. So my smile grows at that feeling, when I confirm I was right.

Memories start to come in seconds to my mind, of your past, of our past. Without thinking it twice I open my arms and walk a step forward. If this is a dream I don't care, I want to hold you, to embrace you as I've longed so much to do. You're here. You are alive. And I don't know how this is possible.

But I feel your hands against my stomach. You're pushing me away, why? I should've guessed something like this would happen. I feel I'm about to cry, the tears I recognize as rejection start to form in my eyes… I shouldn't cry.

You deny in Russian. You sound so cold, so rude.

I look at you, you stand there, in front of me. Then I realize the little boy I had been thinking about as 'my son', is no longer _little_. I'm face to face with a seventeen year old teenager, almost my height. You look rude. I stare at you for a moment. You're wearing just a sweater, a pair of blue trousers, and something strange calls my whole attention. In both cheeks, you have two blue triangles marks. I wonder where does it come from? Since when are they there? I want to ask you so many things… but at the same time, it's time for you to ask. I should let you.

Hours after you must be sleeping, and I've returned to my bedroom. I stare blankly at a picture of you, when you were little. Then I smile playfully, take my calendar on my right hand, and look for today. Today's November 10th. You were born on November 9th, maybe that's the reason you decided to come? You couldn't prevent the doubts and logical questions that came to your mind about your origins? I feel I can understand you… almost.

I circle the day. You decided to come so. I wonder what took you here, how you got to know where we were. Maybe someone told you?

Kai… when we stared at each other in the house entrance, I couldn't help telling you 'I thought you were dead. And if you were alive, I had no hope for you to come here'. I couldn't help it, really. Maybe I confused you more, maybe I hurt you. You were so tired, and so curious, and expectant at the same time. I'm so sorry if that's what I did.

Seeing you looked tired I suggested you to go and sleep for a while. I gave you some blankets. When I showed you the room, leading you from the living room to the place that was, long ago, your bedroom, your eyes opened at each step we took. You're as curious as you've always been.

The living room has three doors. One is the entrance door, that gives to the street. The other, situated in the right side looking from the entrance, gives to a hallway that has in one side, my bedroom, and in the other, the abandoned room that would be yours when you lived here.

The last door in the living room, gives to the kitchen. That door is opposite to the one that gives to the street. The kitchen, apart from that one, has another door. The place that is through it, has three: one of them, is the bathroom. The other, gives to the garden. And the last one, is the one that connects it to the hallway with the bedrooms.

There is also a stair in the hallway. It leads to the attic. There I've saved many things that are not in use, but I love so much I could never get rid of. Demyan almost had to oblige me to put them there, I wouldn't get away from them. But he was right, I was hurting myself.

Those things are, your memories. There is the diary, where I wrote each day of your last year here. There are some pictures, and some books I liked to read to you. Apart from that, in the attic there are many things. Unimportant things that we keep there. But from the photos, the one I like the most is the one in which you are with your father. He's holding your arms. He loves you, Kai. You just don't know about it.

Suddenly I listen a creak. I wouldn't confuse that sound in a million years. It's the sound of your door. You've already woken up… or maybe you couldn't sleep? As for being six am, if you arrived here at four, it's more likely you didn't sleep at all. I wonder what you need.

I'll let you explore for a while. Maybe you just need to go to the bathroom or something like that, I'd like to go and take care of you. But then I realize I shouldn't.

You're no longer that six year old boy that your grandfather took away from me. You're seventeen, you're old enough and can take care on your own. Moreover, I know that if you really need something you'll ask for it.

But I gasp when I hear the stairs noise. I am not mistaken, you're going upstairs. Is there where your curiosity drove you? I should follow, maybe you won't understand. It's clearly visible that you may need my help, I don't want you to feel hurt.

I hear your voice. You're reading something. As I go upstairs, I recognize you've opened the diary, and you're looking inside of it. Your voice sounds much more calm than before. I like it.

" 'What is what you really want my little grandson?' he told him this morning. And Kai put up his sight and honestly said 'I want to show dad… to prove him… I'm worth enough to go with him.' hat the hell is this? Did I say that?"

You speak. You sound confused, I can't figure out what you are thinking right now. Then I look at you. I stand in the attic entrance while you're next to the pile of books I saved here. The key for this diary, I guess you found it on the floor. I left it there, maybe unconsciously I wanted this to be read.

When I realize the piece you've just read, I frown and speak. "what did you just say?". You gasp. Maybe I scared you? It wasn't my intention at all. I just wanted you to feel comfortable and understand this.

You turn around suddenly, your eyes look as if you were fearing something. I know what you're fearing, but I don't think it's time to tell, yet. You feared it was your father. You are afraid of him.

"You can't sleep?" I ask, and you shake your head, subconsciously. "Would you like to have something to drink?" I ask again. You don't seem much talkative, I wonder who did you that? Back before, you would ask about everything, would be interested like any normal child.

This time you don't answer anything. I smile comprehensively at your uncertain look, I know how you feel, I can sense it. You don't understand, at least from what I can see.

"Come on, I'll prepare you some tea." I offer. And as I go downstairs, I hear you following. Possibly if we go and sit down, we can have a better talk. You'll feel much more comfortable and you'll open up. I want to know you too. You may not remember me, but I don't know how you are. I just knew that little son I had, but you're a teenager, and you've changed for sure.

I want to get to you.

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**TBC,**

**Review! **


	3. Demyan

**Hi readerz!!! Sorry for the delay in updating. My friend was in coma for the whole last week and I wasn't having a good time. Yesterday another friend told me she woke up, so now I'm happy again. **

**Thank you for the reviews you sent for last chapter!**

**Hope I don't get killed for the delay, however this chap is longer. :P**

**Enjoy!

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What you have and I want

Chapter 2: Demyan

I walk towards the kitchen, you come behind me holding the book. I'll let you keep it, it's yours… and you found it. So you have every right to keep it with you.

When we get to the kitchen I take the two cups that are on the table, and put them next to the oven. I have to clean the house if you're staying, we've never had visits until this time since long years.

You stand there, next to the table as I clean this cups and start boiling some water to prepare something for you. It's long since I cook for somebody too. You may find this place a little more comfortable and hospitable than the other places in which you've been. That's because your father and I use the kitchen, our room and the bathroom, and no other room of the house.

You place a hand on the table, and stare at me. I feel under pressure with those piercing eyes, but I know I have to stay calm. You didn't come here to hurt me, did you?

I turn around and look at you, you still stare at me with those crimson eyes you have. You look scared. Some minutes after I turn around again. Then I notice you're afraid, but I have no idea what's happening to you. Until I think about the cups I'm washing. That must be.

"I wont hurt you, you know that?" I ask, starting by what I'm sure of. You stare at me, don't answer anything and I wonder why you do that, being so unconfident, so cold. Who did you that?

"What are you fearing, Kai?" I ask again. I need to know if you'll tell me. Though I already know you fear Him, I prefer to stay in silence and don't name him unless you do first. But then I realize that if I go on that way, you'll just close yourself even more, and don't tell anything.

"He's not home, Kai." I try not naming him directly. "He left just before you arrived, that's why I was awake at that time." I explain, liking the sound your name in my lips makes. You sigh relieved, and that makes me smile.

You don't seem to notice how easy is it for me reading your eyes. I have had that ability since forever, but you don't know about it. You open your mouth to say something. "My father… left his house years ago." You finally say, it seems you know nothing more about him. I was right, you feel better now I told you he's not home. Will you try and open up? Only you know about that.

"He… he returned. Demyan returned home three years ago, Kai." I explain. You look confused, but lower your eyes and shook your head, as if wanting to remove some thought of your mind.

"What you just read…" I start explaining, I guess you need an explanation. "… is what I wrote about you. When you lived here." I say. I want to share it with you. I want you to know how I felt, and most of all, how you were when you were five. Because if seems somehow you've forgotten it all.

"He didn't let you go with him." I say. "You were so young to be involved in the outside world, at least that's what we thought. You didn't like beyblade." It's the truth. Like it or not Kai, that's why your father didn't take you with him. You may think I'm speaking so bluntly, but that's the best way I can think of telling such a thing.

"Didn't I? And then why I got involved with my grandfather's organization?" You inquire. You seem so stun, with so many questions you want me to answer. And I'll answer them all, with time.

"Because… you wanted to be like your father." I say, fearing the worst.

You tight your fists, fall in the nearest chair, and hold your head with both hands. You seem so shocked, you _are _shocked. I've seen you trying to pretend everything's alright, but now you're not doing it. I stare confused, maybe I shouldn't have told you that? Maybe I should've kept that topic for some time later, when all this mess has cleared up a bit?

I place the cup in front of you, trying to pretend everything's alright, maybe ignoring you, but you know I care about you. I do feel worried, but if I don't care, or pretend not to care, you'll feel better… at least, that's what I think.

You stare at the tea, I sit in front of you and look at you. Many people have criticized my eyes, the way I look at them. And now I guess you're hating it too. People say I look as if I was analyzing everything, and I can't say I'm not but that's not my intention. I like being with you, that's why I look at you. I'm pleased of having you back with us in this house… that's why I stare at you, because I still can't completely believe it.

I stare at your eyes. By the corner of my eye I can see your hands leaning on the table. What if I touch them? What if I drive my hand towards yours? Will you reject it? Will you accept me? As I think this I stare at your piercing eyes. You look scared, again, forcing yourself to keep the eye contact. If I break it, I know you won't have to force yourself any longer. So that's what I do, I stare blankly at the table.

Then instinctively I move my hand towards yours. Your breath grows faster, but you stay quiet and calculate every movement I make, trying to guess which will be the next one.

At last my hand reaches yours. I hold my breath, and you chill. It's the first conscious contact we've done. Your hands are bare, I thought you wore gloves?

My hand lies on top of yours, I clutch it and drag it to my side. You let it happen, breathing slowly. It seems you don't want to prevent anything, for some unknown reason you're keeping yourself to yourself, and don't say yes or no, you just stay there and let everything happen.

You finally seem to be relaxing, I can see your eyes move from our hands to the cup in front of you. You grab it with your free hand, and take it to your lips. I smile when I notice I'm wishing you like the tea I prepared for you.

You stare at the clock on the kitchen. It's eight am, but it'll still be dark for a while more. About eleven am the sun rises, and it sets about four pm. While you keep staring at the clock, I look back at our hands and start caressing that skin. It's rough, and it's very similar to your father's.

You take the cup, and drink a lot of the liquid inside. Then I realize you're tired, and you look at me." Do you want to try and sleep for a while?" I ask.

"Maybe…" you answer slightly, standing up and grabbing the diary. You walk to the room, but you already know the way back, there is no need for me to go with you. I should leave you your space.

I wonder how much time you'll stay here with us. He'll be back soon, more than that, he'll be back today but I don't know if I should tell you about it. You will be afraid and close your walls again, and I don't want to let that happen.

I am surprised of how much of a loner you have. You keep yourself to yourself, and I would've never guessed my son would be that kind of person. Well, it seems you're going to surprise me a lot during these days.

The first surprise I received was the way you looked when I opened the door. You have dark blue hair, which falls 10 centimeters length in your back, a darker tone than the one in the front. Your crimson eyes captured my attention maybe as much as the pair of blue triangles at each side of your face.

The clothing you were wearing maybe didn't match the temperature outside, you had a grey sweater and jeans, a white, long scarf, covering your neck and shoulders. You were wearing trainers, I guess.

I smile when I realize how much I observed you, how much attention I'm paying not to lose a second of you, of what you do, what you say, I want to know you so I don't want to miss anything.

When I realize an hour has already passed, something comes to my mind. I smile playfully, and slowly stand up from the chair in which I'm sitting. I walk towards your room, you've closed the door but slowly and carefully I open it, making sure it won't make any noise that could wake you up. You're already sleeping, I guessed.

My eyes enjoy so much this picture I see. You seem so calm, so peaceful while you sleep. Maybe I feel that because that's the closest picture to the childish innocence I was accustomed to think about when I pictured my son. Maybe I couldn't imagine you as rude and emotionless as you look, but I tried to imagine you as a child I could hold.

Then I hadn't realized how much changed you are. How much of a man. You don't need to look carefully to see you dad inside you. To see many movements, there are so many things that remind me of him when watching you… as your skin, your hands.

You smile in dreams. I wonder what you're thinking? When your eyes are closed it's more difficult to read what you think, what you feel. The smile fades… I frown… are you having a nightmare Kai?

You start to shake in your bed… you cross your arms above your stomach, what's happening? I want to help you… but everything you're feeling is unconscious. They're all images your mind creates for you, pictures that must be from the past, from the bad and good things you don't understand. You're so confused my son.

You open your mouth, and barely audible you whisper "don't abandon him". I guess I can figure out what the nightmare is about. Why you look so confused and so desperate. I walk next to you, and can see your forehead is covered on sweat. I unfold the blankets, and carefully place them over your body. You seem to be relaxing, and I place a hand on your shoulder.

"Everything's ok Kai…" I whisper, but you keep shaking. I guess I should leave you alone, I don't want you to frighten if you see me here.

When I turn around to leave the room, I notice something small on the floor that wasn't there before. I take it with my right hand, and look at it carefully. It's a small picture of you. It's one of those photos you use for the identity card.

I smile, and put it inside my pocket. You won't notice I took it, besides, if you ask me for it, take for sure I'll return it, I'll tell you that I found it on the floor. But as long as no one asks for it, I'll keep it. This will be my reminder of your stay, and I'm pretty sure I'll need it when you leave.

I go back to the kitchen, and start preparing some soup. I have to eat something, I'm not hungry but I didn't have dinner yesterday.

Some hours ago, I'm sitting in the table and reading a newspaper, maybe to waste some time until you wake up. Demyan will be arriving today, I wonder what will happen… though I can almost imagine it. When I hear your steps, I put up my sight and smile comprehensively. I know you've been dreaming, I hope you're ok now. "Are you feeling better?" I ask. You frown, and nod, sitting in a chair in front of me.

"I have something to ask you." You say. I smile, trying to inspire confidence and hoping you'll speak to me truthfully.

"Tell me." I say, emphasizing the first word. You open your mouth to say something, but then it comes what I feared. A noise in the front door… my husband's key, unlocking it. Oh no Kai… don't frighten...

I close my eyes almost instinctively, I know what's going to happen. You turn around, and stare at the door as it opens. Demyan comes in. He looks so shocked, so surprised to see someone that's not only me inside of the house.. but even more surprised, if that was possible, when he notices how alike this person is to both me and him, and when he notices my look.

You look directly at him, I don't guess that will help… he has his fears too, Kai. Demyan looks so shocked, so frustrated and confused. At the same time I know he's happy to see you back, but that happiness can't be expressed through that look. Fear and guilt are the most evident feelings. You are afraid… I know you are, because your hands are trembling, and his eyes reflect what he sees.

You turn around in a second, stare at me. My look now doesn't inspire confidence at all, but that's because I'm fearing the worst, and after all what was the reaction I don't think I should not be afraid…

I gasp when I see you stand up abruptly, and ran past him, without even turning back to me… where will you go?

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**TBC**

**Review!**


	4. Looking for You

**Thank you for your reviews people!! Lots of thanks! I really appreciate your comments, they make me happy and so I can update faster. **

**Thanks for everyone who's reading too, I'm glad you enjoy my story. **

**And well, here is chapter 3.

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You're Back.

Chapter 3: Looking for you. 

I stare blankly at you, and then at the place where you disappeared… into the storm. Demyan stares at me, and he tries to follow you.

"Stop" I say, in a normal voice. I don't need to demand anything, he's so unsure of what to do that he'll follow my order.

He looks at me, questioning me, demanding an explanation for such a thing I said. "Where are you going?" I ask, he doesn't need to answer but he'll say it anyway…

"I though… I will follow him!" he says, taking it as a completely obvious fact. If only he knew you.

"Demyan? Explain yourself. Why do you want to follow him?"

"He… he's… he… I…" his mind is blank, I know it. Of course, he has the same shock I had when you arrived home. He's just more desperate because he caused you to ran away, I didn't. However I know he'll scare you more if he goes behind you now.

The town's not small. We'll find you if you don't return by yourself.

"Breath, Demyan." I say, trying to keep my voice calm. I know he's scared, I know he's wishing he could control everything right now. But panicking won't help in anything.

"Halina is he… is he…?"

"Our Son." I answer, knowing he still doesn't believe it. But there's no doubt about it, you're so alike him and me at the same time… you _are _Kai, whether your father believes it or not.

"I've got to go for him then!" he says, his voice still hurried and anxious.

"Why?" I ask, and he stares at me as if I had said an aberration.

"Why what? You want him to die in the snowstorm?! It's -30 degrees Celsius out there! He'll freeze and you're letting him!?!" he asks, shocked.

"You forget… he's Russian, he's strong, and we've never been there for him, you can just imagine where he was brought up. Your father lied to us, neither you nor I can imagine what happened to him after what Voltaire did!" I want to throw into his face everything that has happened, but at the same time I know that is no good.

I am mad at him, of course. But I know I shouldn't argue with him, not now, not in the moment you're out there, freezing. I know I should ask him to go and look for him, together.

"Halina… I'm sorry… what can I do? Are you… sure he's going to come back on his own?" he asks, lowering his head and staring blankly at the floor.

"No. No, Demyan, I'm not sure. But I guess we're gonna frighten him, I'm afraid I can do something that hurts him more than what he already is for us not being there, I'm afraid of going for him and not being here when he returns, then he'll just believe we think he's weak and--" he walks to my side, rounds my arms and I rest my head on his shoulder.

"It's okay… we'll wait for a while, then if he doesn't appear we go for him, okay?"

"o… okay…" I answer, above a whisper. He drives me to the sofa, there we sit and he hugs me. He tries to comfort me, I don't need to be comforted, I need to know if you're okay, if you need me, if you hate me or love me.

I want to know how you feel, who you are. I want to read through your eyes that feeling of confidence I haven't read yet, and that's because I know you don't feel safe, you're scared of everything around you; and now he's here, you're even more scared.

Kai… please return…

I stare at the clock in the living room wall. Ten minutes have passed, it's too cold out there, you won't make it out.

But where were you brought up? Did your grandfather take care of you well? Did him keep you for himself? Did you grow up in Russia, or maybe he took you somewhere else? You speak an excellent Russian, that's the only thing that can tell me you've lived in this country for some time. Or maybe you're a good learner and that's all?

No… you have a Russian accent, you have Russian behavior. I can sense it clearly.

Demyan sighs at my side, then I glance again at the clock, and realize ten minutes more have passed. How long will we wait to go for you?

I turn my eyes to the door, I can almost imaging you out there opening slowly, and then you find what? Two people who tell you are your parents, two adults that did nothing to take care of you, those two who you've blamed for your suffering along these years.

Those two people are us.

A pair of idiots who believed in a man's word, who didn't follow their instincts, who trusted an even more idiot who told them their only son was dead, had been killed.

And being an idiot has hard consequences. The consequence is not knowing you, Kai. Realizing that the only things that connect me with you are our eyes, and the name I gave you. And the only things that connect you with your father are your hands, and the surname he gave you. Nothing more.

We didn't teach you anything that any parent can say he taught his son. And just thinking about who could have taught you that, makes me chill. Who had no heart to perform such an action, to raise up a child that's not his or her own, without even asking about his parents.

Or maybe Voltaire lied to that person too? Maybe he pretended to be an old man who was going to die, and wanted his 'only descendant' to have a good life? Maybe he gave you in adoption to a kind hearted family? I don't think so.

Because if that had been the case, you would have asked, and some way or another you would've got to us sooner. Or we would've been alerted you were alive.

And if that was the case, what was Voltaire's purpose in taking you away from us, if he was going to give you to another family with similar characteristics? Besides, you seem to be in a recuperation process. A recuperation from a long nightmare you lived during all your life. I wonder which was the nightmare like? If I asked you that, I almost bet your answer would be something like… 'I guess you won't like listening that' or 'Oh, you wouldn't really like to know'.

"Why are you so cold, son?" I whisper unconsciously.

"Halina? Do you want to go now?" my husband asks, I smile at him and nod.

He rushes to the door, he's still wearing his coat. I put on mine, and follow him. My heart, intuition, or whatever it is tells me to go right, so he follows. We walk about five blocks, nothing. Nothing in any place.

"Shall we divide?" he asks me, I nod, worried about you. We both know the town, you don't. It's easy to get lost, the blocks are not always regular, you can end up by making a mess in your head and not finding the way back.

I go left, he goes right. As I turn back some seconds after, he has already disappeared into the foggy air. I see some lights, they are the lights of the harbor. I run towards them, try to think with the mind of a foreign, someone who comes from a crowd town, a big city.

Besides, someone who's trying to get away from the shadows of his pasts would run towards the illuminated place. You won't like the darkness, your memories are already full of this.

If you really are the cold guy I see, you like calm places where there's not a lot of people… in that case, Demyan will find you because he prefers those places when he needs to think. But if deep in your heart you need to be loved, you need to feel warm, and you need someone to comfort you, you'll go somewhere where you will be seen, where someone will see you and tell your father or me where you are, so we can find you.

If my instinct doesn't fail, you'll go to the light. You will go to the river, the harbor, the coast. There's where I run to. The people who work in the harbor are there, they work till late. I walk close to the ship which seems getting ready to go.

"Someone there!? I need some help!" I shout to the air, one of the men comes closer. He looks dirty, he's a workman and doesn't seem to have a clue of what a woman like me is doing in the street at this time, in the middle of the snowstorm. It's really cold, but it doesn't matter, I'll find you.

"What do you need lady?" he asks, somewhat rudely, in a bad Russian. He's not from here, he must have come with the ship. In the harbor there are usually foreigners.

"I'm looking for a 17 year old guy… he must be somewhere around here!" I have to shout because of the strong wind, my voice is almost inaudible.

"You're Demyan Hiwatari's wife?" another voice asks. This one is a Russian man, apparently he knows my husband.

I nod, almost sensing Demyan was already here. If not, how could he figure out who I was? Maybe my husband already asked about Kai.

"Yeah, we told Demyan to go that way - he points to his right. - we saw a young guy running towards the river."

"Thank you!" I already start running, when I hear him say, 'Good luck madam'.

I keep running and finally see in the distance a figure on the floor. Oh no… my heart starts beating faster, then I finally reach them. You're lying on Demyan's arms when I get to him, and grab his shoulder.

"You… found him…" I say, between fastened breaths.

"We've got to hurry. We're not far from home." He says, desperate but at the same time confident that everything will be alright. I support his confidence by nodding and walking hurriedly at his side, way home.

I stare at you, an argument inside my head trying to decide if it's better for you to wake up now, or once we're at home. While the argument takes place, I see your eyes open worriedly, just a millimeter.

But you're so tired that in your desperation they close again, this time you let your head fall on your father's arm, resigned.

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**TBC,**

**Review! **


	5. Argument

**Hi readers! Thank you very much for the reviews:D You make me so happy… **

**Well, this chapter is the argument between Kai and Demyan. ****Mm… it was hard to write it from an outsider point of view, so I hope you enjoy it! **

**Disclaimer: I claim no rights over Kai and Beyblade, mines are Demyan Hiwatari and Halina Nukomo, and the story, nothing else. **

**Thanx for reading! The story, as you may know, it's about finishing. A chapter and epilogue missing. **

You're Back. 

Chapter 4: Argument. 

I watch you sleep in the bed, our bed. Your father has just laid you here, he's standing right there in the door, while I've decided to stay next to you. I want to be here when you wake up… you will be confused and demand an explanation.

I glance at my husband, he doesn't seem having the best time. Besides, he looks worried and certainly has many reasons to feel like that. You will blame him, I know it and I've already warned him about that. He already knew. I notice him sigh and he walks closer, sitting on a chair next to the bed, in the opposite side that I am.

I notice your breath fastens, and you tighten your fists. Slowly you open your eyes, they look worried. Oh son, if you could only imagine the exasperation I see in those crimson eyes. I know that's how you feel.

Your lips are tinted bluish, the cold outside obviously affected you. You are even paler than before, and your eyes tell me clearly that you are very confused. You look around, and notice him in the other side. I can see the hesitation in your soul whether to say something or stay quiet.

You frown, now your eyes are half opened and you look weak, I know you're not. You must be just taking your time to stand up and start an argument that will last long. I sense it, and prove it when you slowly mouth a weak… "…why?"

I sigh, and slowly take your hand in mine, trying to comfort you in some way. Demyan is puzzled, I find myself unable to tell how he feels. He's looking for a way to tell you the answers you need. I'm not going to give them, it's his turn now. The furthest I can get is to act as a mediator if the argument takes you two to a fight.

He breathes deeply, then he starts. "Kai… I followed you… Because we love you… and know that maybe we've been mistaken but-" No. I knew something like this was going to happen, your father is not the best person at the speaking time, he is trying to say what he thinks you would like to hear, but he absolutely forgets you are no longer that child we had, you're a teenager who can think on his own, who will undoubtedly notice the uncertainty in his voice. You stand up by my side, and just then I realize you are as tall as him.

"No! You don't love me! I'm just your son, the one you decided to forgot, you wanted to forget me, pretend I didn't exist while you knew that I needed you, but what? You tried to ignore me and those things aren't good to do to a son!!" my eyes, already wet because of what I sensed, free at once the tears I had been keeping. I don't want this to go on… but the other side of my mind tells me these things are necessary between people like you and Demyan.

You look at me, and clearly notice I'm crying, though I try to hide it. You place a hand on my shoulder, I gasp at your action, I don't want you to take care of me, I want you to do what you have to do… and that's not worrying about me.

"Kai, please… listen to me…" he says, going worse each time. If only he had listened all the times I tried to talk about these things with him. He can't speak this way to you… because you are not in conditions of reading what he says between the lines. You'll get the literal meaning, you know him as he knows you.

"Listen to you? LISTEN TO YOU?! I'VE NEEDED TO BE LISTENED ALL THE YEARS OF MY LIFE, AND YOU WEREN'T THERE!!! AND NOW YOU WANT ME TO LISTEN?!" Fury comes out of your voice. You sound so frustrated, but won't abandon the situation again. I know it because I can see the argument that at the same time is taking place inside your head.

"Kai calm down!" he keeps talking in a loud, but clear voice. The tears on my cheeks won't stop falling, I know how hard this is for both of you, and feel it for each. If only I could do something.

Your hand on my shoulder tenses up, and you suddenly remove it. I touch my shoulder slightly, noticing the necessity of control you have over everything, whether it's me, your father, or the situation. "Everything that happened has an explanation, Kai, you must understand us…"

"Must?" As you repeat his word, you laugh sarcastically and he stares at you, trying to understand. He won't understand it. But I do, Kai… I've been thinking seriously about your past, there is something that calls my attention the most. And that's the fact that you don't accept musts. You deny everything that presents to you as an obligation, as something you have to do because other person decides so. Where were you brought up, son?

"Why do you laugh?" he asks, instead of thinking it deeply. You seem to already know the answer for this question. What is this about?

"Coz it's a joke. (1) I'm tired of having to do what other people tell me to do!! I don't have to understand anything Demyan, I came looking for my past and that's the only souvenir I'll take when I go back to Japan." You state. My eyes open wide instinctively, for a moment I thought you were staying. What a stupid thought, my mind reprimands. Of course, your life is already established and we're no more than the publicity in the middle of the soap opera. We are nothing to you, the fact that you mean more than anything else in my life, and believe it or not in Demyan's too, doesn't mean that we mean something to you. Maybe we were some of the most frequent questions in your mind… and that's the simple fact that made you choose to look for us.

"We thought you'd…" he tries. Again, that makes you feel even worse.

"You thought nothing! If you had ever wondered about something, you would have looked for me at last, asked about me, lots of people know me here in Russia and it wasn't that hard to ask any of them! But you didn't! You thought anything about me, and I just wanted you to be there! I had imagined you dead, I had thought you weren't there because you couldn't, not because you didn't want to know anything about your son! I thought… I THOUGHT I MATTERED MORE TO YOU THAN YOUR TEDDY BEAR!!!" you shout. That comes for me too. I wasn't there and I feel terribly guilty for that. Thoughtless mistakes I made, in believing in a madman's word and crime story. Your eyes open wide when Demyan grabs your arms. What is he trying to do? Hasn't he understood yet?

You force your arms against him, it seems hard to you. It's natural, Demyan has never been beaten by someone. My face turns to horror when a different thought comes to my mind… where did you get all this strength from? What kind of training made you so strong at this age? We know nothing about your abilities, your strength. And that can only make things worse.

My eyes open wide when you free yourself, I thought you wouldn't do it. You are so strong, Kai… where did all this come from? I bite my lip, you've just pushed him in his chest. Demyan doesn't seem to understand more than me. No… my hands start trembling… where is this going to stop?

You smirk… no… that's a sign that you have even more hatred in your veins… and I can only tell I don't want to experience it… "Kai I…" Demyan tries to say something, I know I won't stand another fight. Another argument. More hate between you… "STOP IT!!" I finally shout… I no longer can control the situation, but control will come back soon, I don't care. I know I won't hurt any of you, you two will hurt each other badly if I let this keep going. I grab Demyan's hands, you look confused at my action. No, son, Demyan is not dangerous. He is scared.

Tears keep falling, I'm so afraid of what you can do to each other. I don't want to see the two people I love the most in the whole world killing each other with their words.

"…Please… Please stop fighting… Demyan leave him alone… leave Kai alone…" I plead. And my voice sounding so broken, tells me that I fear you deep inside. I hadn't notice this until now. Some of the words you said during the argument, were for me too and I feel them thrusting into my heart and soul.

Your breath relaxes, you place a hand on my shoulder and mouth a 'sorry'. I bite my lips again, I can't understand you completely and I doubt I'll ever will. Then you simply walk away from the room, leaving us alone.

I stare at the door through which you've just passed, and then go back at Demyan's hands, which are between mine. I put up my sight and try to read his eyes, try to figure out what he was thinking during the fight, and what he thinks now about his actions.

But when my eyes meet his, I feel surprised to find tears covering them completely. Prohibited tears that he won't let fall. Guilt tears.

"Demyan…?" I ask, barely audible.

"I'm sorry… I… made it all worse. - he says, I understand what he means. However I know that an adolescent like you, with all the hate you feel, would never understand that behind everything he said, there's a deep love. You've got to remember, Kai… your father, is still Voltaire's son. And he has some behaviors that respond to Voltaire's manners. - sorry Halina. -he continues. - go and tell him… whatever you consider it's necessary for him to know… about us, about me." he finishes his sentence and takes a deep breath, his eyes are already dried. He won't let himself cry.

I walk towards your room, and slowly knock the door, after taking a deep breath. "Kai? It's me. I… I'd like to talk to you" I speak uncertainly. I know you need to know many things, and that assures me you will open the door. You have proved me you trust me, and I want you to know everything I can tell you.

"Yeah. C'mon" you answer, maybe lazily, at last. Then a deep silence, and before I open the door you add, "Alone." Demyan was not going to come, Kai, he already knows the pain he has caused. As I open the door you move, you were sitting against it. It's time to let you know my point of view.

(1) : "Why do you laugh?" "Coz it's a joke" : Dialogue that took place in episode 48 first season, "Victory in Defeat", between Voltaire and Kai.

**TBC **

**Review! **


	6. Goodbye

**Hi there! This story is… T.T finished. I've only got to upload the epilogue, and that's all. Well… thanks for all the reviews! And hope you enjoy this last chapter! **

**Note: I tried not to write down the whole dialogues because that'd mean being very repetitive with the first part. That's why I changed it and instead just mentioned the words that are the most important ones from Halina's POV. **

**Enjoy!

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**

You're back. 

Chapter 5: Goodbye. 

I walk into the room, your room. It doesn't seem as desolated as it always was when you are inside. I sit on your bed, while you stay on the floor, next to the door as I found you. I sigh, where shall I begin?

As I start explaining the first part of our story, that may have little to do with you, your eyes look concerned, you remind me of myself when trying not to lose a second of what you were doing. Now you try not to lose a second of what I'm saying, and one way or another, I like the feeling.

"There's when I got pregnant. - as I start this part, I feel myself unsure of whether to keep talking or not. I find back the self confidence when I stare at your interrogative eyes, staring at me, demanding an explanation for the hell your past seems to be.

When I talk about our argument whether to keep you or not, I'm uncertain of how you will interpret it. We had our fears, Kai. I knew you were my son, but what if letting you live caused you more problems than what would be killing you there? Even now I can't say whether if it was a good choice or not. You seem to have suffered so much that I question myself if, killing you, wouldn't have been a way to prevent all that suffering.

"We had the baby, and everything he had told me about his father and the organization seemed to be whole lies during the first five years. You were risen up in Moscow as any child, sometimes forgetting you were Voltaire Hiwatari's grandson. That thing didn't matter to you, what would you understand of power and ambition at that age." I try to position myself in a five-year-old mind. You were so young, so innocent to worry about power, enterprises and prestige.

After I tell you the arguments Voltaire had with your father, and why he had to leave the city, I close my eyes, hoping you will understand, hoping you won't react the same way you did when we were at the other room.

"That's why he left? Because my grandfather ordered him to?" you inquire. I shook my head. You must know Voltaire better than me, you must know about the conditions he imposes.

I take a deep breath, and try to retain the tears that have formed on my eyes. "Voltaire… Voltaire told him… he'd kill his son… if he ever thought of going back to Moscow."

You still have more questions. "and that's why he left?" you ask, still shocked by the previous sentence. You are demanding the answers for your past, and you have every right to ask me. I'll answer everything.

I just nod at your question, and keep talking. "…For the contrary, if he left, he would be able to decide what to do with his career, and his son would, if everything went as we hoped, be safe. But you know Voltaire and his people, and as soon as Demyan left the city--" I have to stop when you interrupt me…

"What happened when he left? How did that happen?" this is what's written in the diary. It was obvious you were going to ask about it.

I finish explaining the departure day with a deep sigh. But you still have more things to ask about. I understand you, Kai… I would have the same amount of doubts if it was my past to talk about. Actually I have them, about your past, about what you lived. But it's not my time to ask. It's yours. "And you didn't prevent me from going? You said nothing?" you ask. I still can't believe your grandfather's manipulations.

"A gun… can stop anything, easily…" I notice tears are moistening my face once again. "And I had to let you go… Kai. I'm… sorry… I had no news about you for three days, and when I went and looked for Voltaire, I found him crying, sitting in a bench… I asked what happened… and he told me… he told me he had been assaulted… and they had took you as his hostage… and one of his men had tried to interfere, and… you had already… already being burnt… I was so stupid…" and I feel even more stupid now that I repeat it, in front of you. How could I believe the man's words? How didn't I question him until he got tired of me, and told me the truth!

I wipe my tears away, I can't break now, I have to keep telling you, I have to let you know all I know. I feel betrayed, and feel like an idiot. It was so easy for him, so easy to make me believe you had died.

Your life was not in risk. Voltaire took you you-know-where to bring you up his way, to make with you whatever he wanted to make, to get you apart from us. In a million years you would understand how I feel, Kai. And that's because you never lost a son, and what's worse, a son you lost never came back to your house. I let me down, I let you down.

You sigh, and stand up. I follow your movements by the corner of my eye, you walk towards me and suddenly place your hands on my shoulders… I wasn't expecting it, and gasp in fear. Son… I'm afraid. Because now it's in your hands the destiny of all those words I have just say. It's all in your hands, whether to understand us, or forget us. And instinctive reaction makes me move backwards, I don't know why but I'm fearing you can hurt me. After all I've done, it'd be even logical. Almost _Fair_. But it doesn't seem fair for you, you hold my shoulders and keep me close to you.

"Halina…- you whisper my name, my fear is slowly going away. -thanks a lot… for telling me this. I know you both have done many mistakes… but I also know that you… tried to give the best of you…" I feel I have no words, for the first time in many years, to say what I want to say. It was an answer I needed… and I hope it's not to satisfy the need you have perceived in me that you say it.

I try to mouth something, just a single 'Sorry' comes out of my mouth. My tears fall in your hands, I wonder how you will take it. You seem surprised, and stare at me, as demanding an explanation. I lift my head slowly, my reddish eyes stare at yours. I've cried a lot today. But I never saw you cry.

My eyes meet those that are equal, and then I feel something I've never felt before. Though your eyes are in some way cold, I feel a kind of connection I had never experienced… I feel you are not longer afraid of me, I can sense you want to get to me, maybe as much as I want to get to you…

Your left hand touches my eye, and you wipe away some tears, I thought it was something you wouldn't do. "It's okay… stop crying." You say, like repeating some orders, I shook my head in misunderstanding.

But I keep quiet, and silently leave your room, whispering a low 'good night' as I close the door behind me.

As I get to the kitchen I see Demyan, sitting in one of the chairs of the round wooden table. He's looking at some papers that he got from some old drawer. He's looking at your pictures, old pictures of your childhood. Now he wants to remember too.

I smile, and when he looks at me I nod, he smiles back. I smile playfully when I notice that hours ago, I was questioning myself why you weren't much talkative. Neither me nor your father like talking very much.

I go to my room, sit on the bed and lay staring at the floor. Some minutes later I notice Demyan is entering, he lays on the other side of the bed and hugs me. "you knew something like this was going to happen" a statement, not a question. I smile… maybe what he is saying it's true.

Hours after I hear your door opening, and open mine, to check on you. I sense it, you are leaving. It's obvious I want to prevent this, I would like to delay your departure as much as possible. But if I did so, I would be going against your will. And it's not what I want to do. I've got to let you free, so you can return whenever you want.

You walk towards me, and I smile when you look at me. I try to sound normal, "Leaving?" I ask, however, my voice is weak and you notice my sadness.

You nod, and I breath deeply. How I wish this moment would delay, some minutes more. I gasp when I feel you grabbing one of my hands, my eyes open wide. "It's fine like this." You answer. I stare at your eyes. Can he come? Will you let him say goodbye?

Your eyes denote horror when you notice my intentions, but I smile and whisper, 'it's okay'. I've already talked to him, he will be respectful.

I walk back to our room, Demyan is already standing on the door. "He's leaving?" he asks me, worried but at the same time understanding my sadness. I nod, and try once again to prevent the tears from falling. How much I'll miss you… Kai.

I go to the living room, Demyan follows me. He is no longer scared, I have proved him you won't harm any of us, that was never your intention.

I walk to the door, the key in my hand. I open it, I don't want to seem retaining. "Do you want me to call a taxi for you?" I ask, due to the darkness I can see outside. You deny, I don't complain, and watch you turn around and glance at the house, your home from now on. Do you feel it a home? Do we make it a home?

I exchange uncertain looks with my husband, I know he's going to do the right thing. Then you turn back again, and look at Demyan. He looks at you, and reaches a hand to my side… he's trying to do things the right way, Kai. you should accept his hand, but I know that deep inside you're still afraid.

He's trying to be honest with you. He's putting away his fears, confronting them, and trying to make peace after yesterday's fight. He deserves you shake hands with him as much as you deserve it. Slowly you approach his hand with yours, I look at your movements carefully. You keep the eye contact, both are reluctant to break it. You both smirk, your gestures are so alike you would never imagine.

Then you turn to me, Demyan's turn to watch in silence. You know I want to embrace you, God knows when will be the last time I see you. Some tears come to my eyes at that thought, I really want you to stay for more time. You give a step forward, so uncertain, confused. When you're close enough you nod, allowing me to do something I tried to do some hours ago. I understand it, and hoping I haven't misunderstood I round you with my arms. I'm scared, it's the first time I hug a son in ten years. How do I do it? You do nothing to hug me back, you just stay quiet. Instinctively I kiss your cheek, and with my hands rub your back. I guess you will do nothing, and I'll just have to accept it this way. It's when we get apart that I gasp noticing you grab hold of my hands. I look deep in your eyes, and understand your message. Does everything end here?

You walk some steps backwards, and turn around, to start walking in the direction of the train station. We watch you leave. There are things I'll never forget.

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**THE END **

**Review! **


	7. Epilogue

**Hi! Thanks for the reviews and here it is, the last part of the story. T.T It made me cry writing it… it's sad when a story finishes. **

**Well I hope you like it, and I sincerely thank all of you for reviewing this story. Mom, I hope you liked it. **

**Mmm… nothing else to say than, enjoy!, and please review!

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You're back 

Epilogue. 

I rest my head on my husband's shoulder, the tears falling from my eyes to his coat. He hugs me, I know I have to be strong. It's your decision and I have to accept it, whether it favors me or not.

Suddenly I realize something I hadn't thought about before. You're independent, you can make decisions on your own, you can manage yourself without needing me there.

The fact that I was not part of the trajectory you went through in order to become the young man you are now, makes me feel guilty… sad, maybe disappointed on my own self.

I knew I should've been, I know you are strong, rude, tough, and smart right now, but I can't help the needing of taking some role between the many actors that were part of your life.

I wasn't there. Nor was your father, and that was because of my weakness.

It doesn't matter how much you or anyone else can try to convince me that it wasn't my fault, that as you said yesterday in your room, we were all mere puppets of a madman's play where he would become the only one who knew the real truth. You won't convince me.

Deep inside my heart I feel a great pain, and that pain will never be replaced. How long will it take for you to come back? Will you ever decide to come back home?

Demyan rubs my back, tries once again to comfort me. I have no idea how we got to be sitting in the sofa, the door was somehow closed, I don't remember and I don't want to remember either.

"Stop crying Halina… you know he's okay… he's following the path he trusts, he's making his own decision. We can just be glad he decided to meet us." He speaks calmly, I know he can deal with this kind of things fast but I can't. It'll take me a lot more to deal with your absence.

I had already got used to you being dead. That was easy, though. I could always speak to you, you could hear me. I do believe in God, and I had assumed you were somewhere with him in the great place that is the Paradise.

But now, I know you are there. You must be traveling in the train that will take you to Moscow. And then, who knows, maybe you go to Japan. I wonder if you are staying with a family, if you are working, maybe you are staying at a friend's?

It's difficult to guess about that things, I never talked to you about them. Actually I was never interested in you answering to the so many questions I had, I wanted to answer yours. I always tried to give you all you could need.

Kai… with seventeen years old, and no parents available in your Identity Card, you are traveling around the world and moving on your own, as if you already were an adult. That's because you think like adults, you behave like adults. You're the most mature adolescent I've ever seen.

My husband interrupts my thoughts. "How do you think he get to know where we were?" he asks. And I have no clue for that answer.

"I have no idea. Someone who knows us and may have traveled to Japan?" I suggest vaguely. I don't want to think about this now.

He gasps suddenly. I stare at him, questioningly. "I only told one person about what happened to our son, years ago. Marcus has two children, and they are involved in beyblade world. It is possible, that one of his teens could have traveled to Japan during beyblade tournaments." He states. And Demyan has always being smart at the time of taking practical conclusions.

Marcus has always being a friend of us. He has a wife, and two children, a boy of thirteen, and a girl of seventeen. He lives in a city between Moscow and Stadavock, and works in the enterprise with my husband. As for being close friends, we've shared with that family our bad experiences, and that closeness also made their children call us 'aunt' and 'uncle' sometimes.

I loved those children trying to give to somebody the love I couldn't give to you. Jonathan is a good writer, and always likes to talk about the novels I read. I get on very well with him. Whereas, the girl is different. She travels around the world, and has participated twice in the Beyblade Tournaments. She has turned on the introspective side now, she likes keeping herself to herself, and recently dyed her reddish hair black.

"What about Eliana? - I ask, now getting interested in the conversation. - did she come to the city this November?"

"Yes… but she was returning today to Moscow. She must be taking the train that left Stadavock this morning." I sigh, someday we may find out what connected you to us.

I still don't believe completely what happened during the last 25 hours. My son, who was long dead from my point of view, appeared in my door at 4 o'clock in the morning, demanding for someone to answer. And here I was. Here I am, in the same place I was when I heard your knock in the door.

Kai… there are so many things I still want to understand… and it will all have it's time.

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**Thanks to all the ones who supported this fanfiction. I hope you will be reading the third and last part, which takes place some years later and it's from… another _son_'s point of view. You'll see. **

**I love you. **

**Mikaera. **


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